Life by the Numbers - The Statistics of Life

Numbers don't lie, check the scoreboard

We’ve all seen the videos.

A broccoli-haired zoomer goes up to an unsuspecting co-ed.

He asks her how much money her ideal boyfriend should make.

“250K per year, I don’t date broke boys.”

You open the comments.

“Modern women are so detached from reality.”

“The average salary in the US is $50K per year, what does she expect?”

“She needs to lower her expectations, this is unrealistic and toxic.”

Is she really detached from reality, though?

Is it possible that men are the detached ones?

What if we’re all missing the mark…?

In fact… maybe we are…

The numbers tell a completely different story…

The Math ain’t Mathin’

Math is one of my favorite subjects.

Cold, logical, emotionless. Easy to grasp, if you’re not a brainlet.

At it’s core, math is the language of reality.

Without straying too far on the subject of Simulation Theory, math is an apolitical/agender/asexual, empirical way of understanding everything as we know it.

Everything can be quantified, predicted, and analyzed through the lens of math. It also has an element of purity that's hard to find elsewhere - no matter how much anyone argues, 1 + 1 will never equal 3, not for any practical purposes, anyways.

Anyways, math is made up of a lot of numbers, infinitely many if we’re being precise, and even for the biggest nerd, understanding all of these numbers collectively is a difficult task.

Enter Statistics.

Fun fact - did you know there are different types of infinity?

The Oxford Dictionary defines Statistics as the practice or science of collecting and analyzing numerical data…

Fuck all that, let’s use an example:

Imagine you have a bag of multi-colored candy.

You want to know what color comes up the most.

You could dump out the bag and sort the candy by color.

Counting them up, you find there are more red candies than any other color.

Congratulations, you've just learned the basics of statistics!

Statistics is all making sense of large amounts of data. It helps us understand what's typical, what's unusual, and what patterns we can spot.

We can use it to predict things like who's most likely to win a game, or even something as important as the weather.

Statistics is particularly useful when analyzing the broad behavior of populations, allowing us to derive conclusions about society as a whole.

Here’s a few interesting stats for you to ponder:

• Mean American Income (2020): $71,456

• Median American Income (2022): $54,231

• Median Annual Income, 25-34 yr olds (2022): $50,752

• Average Cost to Give Birth (2020): ~$18K

• Average Cost to Raise a Child (2023): $310,605

• Average Monthly Child Care Cost (2023): $850

• Average Grocery Bill, Family of Four, (2023): $1,311.50

• Average Monthly Mortgage Payment (2023): $2,823

Be honest with me…

You see those numbers, and what do you immediately feel?

If you have a pulse, and you can add, you should immediately think to yourself, “Oh shit.”

Oh shit is right, brother.

Just looking at the last 3 numbers should immediately set off alarms in your head.

$850 + $1311 + $2823 = $4,984.

Times 12 is $59,808.

Assuming a cozy 25% tax rate, You AGI needs to be at least $79,744 to even stand a chance to finance an average lifestyle in the US.

Now look back at the Median/Mean Incomes in America.

Do you see the problem?

God Bless America in deed.